This is the kind of post I make when I’m sick. Below I’ve listed some of the things that make me cry. Most of these are scenes from movies and TV shows. What makes these unique are two things: 1. It doesn’t matter how many times I see it, these things still to this day will cause me to at the very least, chock up a little as my eyes start to water. 2. I’m not ashamed of any of these entries, and most adult males would agree with me on at least a few of these. It is kind of a depressing topic, but only kind of since most of these entries are based in the world of fiction and not true events, so there is a limit to abject sorrow one can really feel from them.
Up – Pixar is the worst
I had a friend tell me that she took her 6 year old son to see this in the theatre and she was bawling like a baby. I hadn’t heard anything about the movie aside from it being a CGI kids movie so I first asked if she didn’t mean her son was the one crying, and then when she confirmed it was her that cried, I mocked her. It’s a kid’s movie, maybe it’s ok to tear up, but shouldn’t out right cry during it.
A couple months later I downloaded a screener of the movie and had completely forgotten about that conversation until about 10 minutes into the movie. I actually had to pause the movie so that I could adequately curse the God’s that would make me care so much for an animated couple in such an insanely short time period. The movie is great, but my god does that opening sequence destroy any happiness that might be in your soul prior to having watched it for the first time.
ER – Mark Green and Samoan remixes
Although the show was supposed to be about John Carter (not that civil war guy who went to mars in a fucking terrible movie), the show for the first 5 or 6 years, was really about Mark Green. He was as close to a father figure as the show had. He was the moral compass for much of the show, and his passing really signaled a changing of the guard on the show. So when he finally died on the show (he got a one or two year reprieve from his battle with a brain tumor earlier) many people like me weren’t saying goodbye to just a beloved character, but also the show they thoroughly enjoyed for many seasons.
Another aspect that made this emotional was the fact that watching Mark try to accomplish a mini bucket list before he died, most of which was centered around his family, made you wonder what you would do if you were placed in a similar situation. I know for a fact that I would not face death with my held high, and instead would go out whimpering like a little bitch.
A few more things I want to mention about this entry, it’s not the scene below that makes me cry, although it totally does. It is the entirety of those last two episodes where they show the ER’s reaction to his death, and his last moments with his family. ER probably did the best job any show has ever done of killing a character as gracefully, and lovingly, and powerfully as possible. Everything about it was pitch perfect from Green telling John Carter that he “set’s the tone”, or the montage with Green walking through a brightly and angelically lit ER room during that Samoan “Over the Rainbow” cover.
The 5 People you meet in Heaven / For one More Day
Some day I will read Tuesday’s with Mauray, but I have a feeling it will be a total tear jerker like these two. I do believe these are the only two books i’ve ever read that made me cry. NO, none of the Lord of the Rings made me cry, not even when the Ents saw what Sauroman had done to that forest around his tower.
The Wire – Pretty much everything with season 4
The wire really had a lot of powerfully emotional season, but most didn’t really instill me with sadness. There were some exceptions, and they ere all in season 4 I think. If you’ve never watched the show GO WATCH IT NOW CAUSE OMYGODITISTHEBESTSHOWEVEREXCEPTFORMAYBEBREAKINGBADWHICHYOUSHOULDALSOWATCHRIGHTNOW. But for those who wish to finish reading this post before they watch the entire series, season 4 focused on a group of middle school students. There are a couple scenes where one of the Detectives tries his hardest to make a positive impact on one of the young kids lives, and it all goes to shit. It’s awful.
Oz – The slow guy dies
Actually this is a lie, and if you haven’t watched this show, it is good although it does get a little repetitive and ridiculous towards the end. That being said, there was one character whose almost death and then actual death sent you on a two episode tail spin of emotion. There were not a whole lot of characters on the show you truly rooted for, but this was one of them. Not to give it away, but they basically did something that only Texas is really known for when it comes to treating a certain type of inmate.
Field of Dreams – Wanna have a catch?
I never had a dad, but even I can still get sentimental at the idea of playing catch one last time with your father.
Green Mile – Lou Gehrig balls like a baby
I know that S. King hates most of the movies made from his books and short stories, but this movie is excellent. There is just something that gets to me any time someone with diminished mental capacities is electrocuted.
Forrest Gump – Gump isn’t that dumb
It’s a small thing, but when Forrest finds out he’s a father the part that gets to me is that he instantly becomes concerned that the kid is like him, and is … man this list has a lot of below average intelligence people (and yes i’m including Ray’s brother in law in field of dreams). It just tears me up that 1. Forrest is aware that he isn’t as smart as other people, 2. that he knows that this has caused him some major heart ache in his life and would make it difficult for his son, 3. He is instantly concerned for his son, and all the other things that might pop into your mind like “bitch you said you were on the pill” don’t even cross his mind.
Bucket List – Eulogy
My mom was dying of cancer when this movie came out. She really liked it and could not figure out why her three children were breaking down in tears trying to watch it with her. Once again, she faced death with her head held high, where as I, will go out like a sad sad pathetic baby. While most of the movie isn’t that sad, the ending montage, which starts about 3 or 4 minutes before the eulogy tears me up cause it is just pitch perfect.
We are Marshal – 15 endings
The clip i’m including with this doesn’t actually make me cry i don’t think. I’m just including it cause it is one of only like 3 scenes in the movie that doesn’t make me cry. Seriously, it is an emotional scene, just like ever scene in the movie. So if this is the least tear inducing scene, imagine what the rest are like.
South Park The Movie – Kenny speaks This is the one that actually brings me the most shame by far. While most of the other entries on this list are supposed to be emotionally heavy moments that might be specifically designed to make people sad and tearful, this is just a random moment from an animated comedy musical. Other stuff that almost made the top 10 or how ever many are above, but didn’t cause I don’t actually get weepy during all of these but i might chock up a little:
- Rocky …3? when Rocky hears the now dead Mickey say “Get up, cause Mickey luvs ya
- MASH – When they announce that Coln… um not Potter is dead.. I think it was Henry Blake
- For Love of the Game – When the catcher “The Magic Man” tells Crash they don’t suck today and they are all there for him.
- RIP Curtis “Lem” Lemansky
- Brooks was here
- It’s not will Huntings fault
- 50/50 when you find out seth rogen was reading all those cancer books
- Marley and Me… ok bull shit. i call bs on myself cause i sobbed during the end.